Not all nerds are Word Nerds; but all Word Nerds are about… vocabulary. The Word Nerd loves their words, and wants more. More. More!
The Silent nerds give us the pacesetter in this domain: William Harper Littlejohn, a stalwart member of the first superhero team – well, ever.
In the Thirties, there was a serial adventure series called Doc Savage.[1] These were heart-stopping tales of Clark Savage, Jr., the Man of Bronze, a very well-tanned polymath with uncommon strength, purpose, and resources. He bounced around the pre-World War II globe with his team of sidekicks , the Fabulous Five:[2] Monk, Ham, Renny, Long Tom, and… Johnny, William Harper Littlejohn. Each of Doc’s lieutenants is a world-class expert in his areas of expertise: Johnny’s fields are geology and archaeology. And big words.
Johnny will never use a short word when a long one will do. His catch-phrase is, “Well, I’ll be superamalgamated!” (see artwork above for a classic example, from the Seventies Marvel comic version).
Nerds love big words! So evident did this become in the cultural mainstream that New York Times humorist Russell Baker took a shot at it himself in a column called “Anti-Anglo-Saxonism”, which rebounded off George Carlin’s “Seven Words You Can’t Say on Television” – both a reaction to the Supreme Court’s ruling that there were that many words that were too obscene for the federally-regulated public airwaves:
Shit
Fuck
Piss
Cunt
Cocksucker
Motherfucker
(and, of course,)
Tits
Baker’s nerd translation of Carlin’s riff is a showcase of nerd-literate revisionisn:
Defectation
Sexual intercourse
Micturition
Female reproductive canal
Practitioner of fellatio
Incestuous male issue
(and, of course,)
Female mammary glands
Baker goes on to excoriate the news media for its retreat onto this nerd turf in order to prevaricate – to soften news by pretending it’s something it isn’t, news that should be simple and straightforward; the softening mutes the horror, and it shouldn’t:
“During the Vietnam War, ‘bombing’ was turned into ‘interdiction’,” Russell wrote. “Those who pointed out that it was, nevertheless, bombing and that people were being killed were said to be unduly emotional and urged to Latinize their thinking. Admittedly, there were ‘casualties’, as there would be in any ‘program of pacification’.
“In general, government justifications for the war were issued in Latin. People against the war were Latinized into ‘dissidents’ with their own connivance. A ‘dissident’ was far less likely to disturb his neighbor than a ‘war hater’. When ‘dissidents’ wanted to set public teeth on edge, however, they shouted in Anglo-Saxon. (‘Stop the killing!’) The American minority who still liked to communicate talked in Saxonic monosyllables – of ‘hawks’ and ‘doves’…”
Get the drift here? This is rich, multi-layered territory, not just intellectually stimulating and good for much nerd fun in mixed social strata, but for actually shaping your young nerd’s perception of society.
Turn to Russell Baker for the latter; for the nerd fun, it’s about saying terrible things in public and getting away with it:
Cacafuego: a self-important loudmouth
Bescumer: to cover with poop
Hircismus: armpit odor
Coccydynia: a pain in the ass
Buncombe: bullshit
Not even beloved Spock is immune:
Spock: Random factors seem to have operated in our favor.
McCoy: In plain, non-Vulcan English, we've been 'lucky'.
Spock: I believe I said that, Doctor.
Well, you get the idea. Boosting your young nerd’s vocabulary to Spockian or Bakerian levels can not only increase their status among nerds and boost their daily fun, but can enhance their understanding of the human condition and serve as a hedge against swirlies and being stuffed in lockers.
Deploy it freely!
EXERCISE
For the foreseeable future, whenever you’re in the SUV with your young nerds, teach them a new word. Quiz them regularly, to make sure they stick, doling out rewards as needed.
Here are some random starters:
excoriate
prevaricate
discombobulate
prognosticate
salubrious
confabulation
vituperative
caliginous
torpor
onomatopoeia
anomaly
capricious
grandiloquent
mendacious
acculturation
quintessence
contumacious
antediluvian
And, just for fun, throw in
buncombe
[1] If you haven’t checked out Doc Savage, run, don’t walk! This stuff is nerd heaven, precursor to all your favorite comic book heroes and the cinematic superhero universe.
[2] The word “fabulous” here is not deployed with its current 21st century intimations.
Comentarios